My daughter likes to monologue when she draws pictures. She likes to draw the characters on her notepad, make up stories, and narrate the event. I usually pretend not to listen to her, but last night I had to participate in her play purposefully.
I overheard the scene she was into; one girl punched the other girl's nose bleeding, and this mean girl felt good about hurting her friend. I could sense that my little one was trying to experiment the concept of bully indirect way.
First I had to be sure what are the exact definition of bully.
- [NOUN] A bully is someone who uses their strength or power to hurt or frighten other people.
- [VERB] If someone bullies you, they use their strength or power to hurt or frighten you.
"Who's the bully in the Cinderella story?" I asked.
"The evil step-mother," my daughter answers, "she is the bully."
"Who's the bully in the Snow White story?" I asked.
"The evil queen," my daughter replied, "she's the bully."
"Why do you think so?" I questioned.
"Because she was jealous of Snow White and she tried to kill her."
"Who's the bully in the Aladdin story?" I continued.
"Jafar, the evil sorcerer," she frowned as if she disapproved of him, "he's the bad guy."
"Why do you think so?" Again, I asked.
For a second she seemed to think of the answer, and went on to explain, "because he tried to hypnotize Sultan and tried to kill Aladdin and Jasmine."
"Who's the bully in the Little Mermaid story?"
"The evil octopus witch!" she screamed and went on, "she looks disgusting."
"Why do you think she's the bully?" I asked.
"Because she tricked Ariel and tried to use her voice to get married to Prince Eric."
"Who's the bully in the Tangled?" again I inquired.
"Rapunzel's mom," she was passionate to answer,"but you know, she's not the real mom. She is the wicked sorceress."
"Why do you think she's the bully?" my eyes were fixed on her face.
"Because she kidnapped Rapunzel and used Rapunzel's hair so that she could stay young."
The lesson of this conversation was clear. I wanted her to understand there are certain actions being categorized as a bully. She was warned many times about her aggressive behavior, often it was labeled "her strong character" or "leadership" if we put it in a positive way. But I realized there was lacking of clear explanation to persuade her to stop such behavior. Now given these examples I wonder how she will react in the future occurrence. I hope she choose the right thing.